You Are Enough

19 March 2016


1. You are good enough because you are still looking for the time that heals and the last tendril of fight left in you. And even though you think you won't find any, you still stand in the sun for a better view.


2. It's been two years and tequila still tastes like the last drunk text you swear you'll ever send. It's spending your days peering inside every white car even though you haven't seen his silhouette after the 417th one. It's everything still hurting so much worse at 3am. It's saying his name during brunch with your friends and trying not to wince. It's living despite the dull ache that has burrowed into the deep recesses of your heart and made a home out of it. There should be a word for your kind of tenacity.

3. Yeah, the new girl looks like the fucking sun, but you have one thing he doesn't: you.

4. You are here. You are still here. Sometimes fully, often not. But you are here and the stars left shining in your sky still put his city lights to shame after all this time. You are here, and somewhere is a stranger who will love you even after he's seen your darkest night.

5. On days that you find it hard to breathe, remember that you can always set fire to the wasteland he left in your lungs. Forge an armor from the fire, no matter how misshapen, and soon you will find that nothing can touch you.

6. Look how your soul is already thanking you for starting to put your fist down for your ghosts. Don't let her down.

7. Your mother is wondering how you've subsisted this long on nothing but glass shards and ugly poems. Little does she know that roses aren't as delicate as they look.

8. There will come a day when kissing someone else won't feel like betrayal anymore. You won't have to beg his memory for forgiveness each time you use words like "sweet" and "sinful" and "honey" on another boy. Churches will start to gather dust as soon as you stop going to confess right after another person has touched you. This is what it's like to have history, darling.

9. Your heart is exhausted and the quiet kind of sadness can do that. They say time is supposed to be the answer, but maybe that's a lie. Maybe you are the answer. You're the one to scoop yourself some full-fat ice cream and give yourself some rest. You're the one to tell yourself you are beautiful even after your ribs have cracked open upon the scent of his cheap cologne. You are beautiful even on the days you confuse desperation for romance. Beautiful even when you keep digging him up from his grave, hoping that each time would be different. Even after entire nations have crumbled inside you yet wars continue to wage. Art is art long after the lights have been turned off.

Photo by Tim Etchells

8 comments

  1. This is beautiful but sad at the same time. This sounds so familiar to me but let me tell you this. One day, you'll find someone who'll love you as much as you love him. Wait for it and it would be so wonderful. :)

    http://thewallflowersecrets.com

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  2. Awwwe, this is beautifully written. Somehow explains the things I've always been keeping. I should insert a song there!

    Lou | wander-soul.net

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  3. Clarisse. These words are so beautifully juxtaposed. :)

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  4. A good-writer doesn't seem enough to describe you. This one's beautifully-written. <3 Sums up my feelings at one point or another.

    xx, Da | The Diary Queen

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